Friday, February 13, 2009

Uncomfortable can kiss my a$$

So, since I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and high cholesterol I have been doing such a wonderful job (if I do say so myself) eating healthier and getting active. I'm making better choices...salad instead of fries, grilled chicken instead of burgers, broccoli instead of potatoes, etc. And, I have to say that I have been feeling a thousand times better. The healthier lifestyle has had an incredible effect on my mental and emotional health, as well. I've been happier...over the top crazy happy. Very bizarre, but I'm not complaining. So why if I'm feeling so much better did I decide to have a burger and fries for lunch today? I have no idea what I was thinking. Oh sure I do. I was thinking...I've been doing so well I deserve this. Well, I'm an idiot. A moron. A complete fool. Within 30 minutes of eating this greasy disgusting meal (I used to LOVE burgers and fries...I am American after all) I knew it was a mistake. I feel just miserable physically. I have this crappy over full feeling and this heavy gross feeling and it's just trying to wreck my Zen. So...goodbye greasy carb filled food. It's been great, but you are holding me back and I'm tired of it.

I went to the sleep clinic at the hospital recently to meet with a neurologist about the quality of my sleep. Apparently I don't sleep well. Who knew? Well, this had to be the most uncomfortable medical appointment that I've ever had...being fully dressed, that is. The doctor would ask me a question. I'd answer. Then he'd sit there and stare into my eyes like he was trying to peer into my soul. Then another question. I'd answer. Then more soul peering. This went on for what felt like hours, but was only about 20 minutes. Every time he did the peering thing I was trying to figure out what the hell he was doing. In my head I was asking myself..."should I say something else?" "Is he trying to will me into jumping him (he was kind of cute)" "Should I make some random bizarre comment?" I decided to be silent until he was done analyzing my soul. Frankly, if I made one of my usual disturbing comments it's entirely likely he would have had me committed that moment and...well...I like my insanity. I did think briefly of trying to turn it back around on him and stare into his eyes...but, knowing my luck he would think that I was trying to make a pass at him and I'd have a whole different set of problems right now.

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